The Larry King-ish Stream of Consciousness Column for 10/2

In this edition of the LKSOC…the mess with UNC football gets worse, the worst moments of Tennessee DB’s are revisited and Barry Switzer shares some precious memories:

◊ It looks like John Blake was getting straight paid by Gary Wichard

The investigation into the funny business North Carolina football team has revealed that agent Gary Wichard of Pro Tect Management and former Tar Heel assistant coach Jon Blake were just a little more than casual acquaintances. Dan Wetzel of Yahoo! provides a few of the particulars right here:

Time and a slew of different investigative bodies will determine the extent of Blake and Wichard’s relationship and whether it involved the recruitment of Tar Heel players.  Yahoo! Sports reported Wednesday the existence of at least six wire transfers from Wichard’s private bank to Blake, a credit card from Wichard’s Pro Tect Management in Blake’s name and a personal loan given to the long-time college coach.  Blake previously worked for Wichard. (Yahoo! Sports)

C’mon Dan, you’re wondering whether or not Wichard’s relationship with Blake involved the recruitment of Tar Heel players?  Jesus, maybe you need a refresher course, it’s all ball bearings nowadays ($1 To Irwin Fletcher).  Why else would Wichard be funneling money to him?  Perhaps you need that stuff you referenced put together in bullet point format, you know, to make it more understandable:

• Six wire transfers from Wichard’s bank, The First National Bank of Long Island, to Blake

• A $45,000 personal loan to Blake from The First National Bank of Long Island

• A Pro Tect Management credit card that was issued to Blake

Here’s the problem facing UNC with this mess: this isn’t some agent who’s snooping around campus trying to entice football players to sign with him using $100 handshakes. This involved an actual, honest to goodness assistant coach who was on an agent’s payroll. If people thought the punishment USC got was harsh, wait until they get a load of the penalties that UNC football will be hit with down the road.

◊ Players’ lowest moments, saved for posterity

Guess who wishes YouTube (and by extension the interwebs) was never invented? If you said, “Tennessee defensive backs,” you’d be correct:

◊ Despite beating Texas, UCLA’s still pretty crappy

With a win over Washington State today, UCLA can do something I thought was impossible less than two weeks ago: they can move over .500 for the season. That’s yet another unexpected result to come out of the Bruins’ mindboggling road win over Texas this past Saturday.

But I’m not ready to check this one off in the “W” column for the Bruins just because it’s lowly Wazzu that’s coming to town. That’s because UCLA is still a football team with a one dimensional offense and a defense that’s yielding 4.6 yards a carry to the opposition.

I’m not backing off of my preseason bottom 10 ranking for Wazzu, because this is a team that most certainly sucks ass. But what better opportunity for a Pac-10 road win will Paul Wulff’s team have?

The glaring flaw thus far for the Cougars has been defending the pass. Washington State has the nation’s 116th-ranked pass defense, giving up 286.2 yards a game and 13 scoring tosses already this season. But UCLA isn’t really equipped to take advantage of that weakness, currently ranking 118th nationally in pass offense.

Will Wazzu have enough pride to suck it up, stuff the Bruin rushing attack and make this one interesting? Heck, might as well try to force a shootout, it’s the best approach to take.

◊ Sorry Glenn, there’s always someone with a camera

Remember rocker Glenn Danzig, the lead singer for the band that carries his name? If not, let me refresh your memory:

That was back in the early 90’s. Here’s Glenn today, wearing his own band’s t-shirt and lugging kitty litter to his car:

After seeing this, I’m convinced that somewhere there’s a picture of Dave Mustaine cleaning out a port-a-potty. Please, interwebs, give that treasure to me.

◊ Grab an older guy’s hand and avoid that shit on the ground

Here’s an epic excerpt from a Dallas Morning News interview with former Oklahoma coach Barry Switzer. Here he shares some of his fondest memories of playing Texas every year in the Cotton Bowl:

Well, it’s me telling those freshmen that have never been down that ramp to watch where Bevo’s been because it will be a big pile, and I don’t want you to step in it. I told the rookies to grab the hand of a veteran and they will lead you down, because there will be so many stars in your eyes that you won’t even look down to see all of that stuff.  To go on that field is a great excitement and atmosphere, but nothing tops being in the locker room after winning the ball game. (Dallas Morning News)

Now that I think about it, I guess getting shit on his cleats would be pretty damn demoralizing for an Oklahoma freshman participating in his first Red River Shootout.

Weslye Saunders ends Steve Spurrier’s run of good luck with the Tar Heel State

The state of North Carolina’s been pretty damn good to the Ol’ Ballcoach the last few years.  You see, while Steve Spurrier’s recruiting cupboard is mostly stocked from the fertile recruiting grounds of his own South Carolina, he does from time to time head north to raid the Tar Heel State.

While he’s supplemented his roster with North Carolinians (the count is 17 right now), he’s also had his win total padded at the expense of his northern neighbors.   In ‘07, the Gamecocks beat UNC in Columbia and won both ends of a home and home with NC State the last two seasons.

However, South Carolina’s latest link to North Carolina is one of a decidedly less positive nature.  It seems Gamecock tight end Weslye Saunders is good friends with Marvin Austin, the Tar Heel defensive tackle who’s the center of the NCAA investigation in Chapel Hill. Lo and behold, the NCAA is now showing Saunders some love as well.

Did Saunders accompany Austin on that now infamous trip to Miami back in May? As of right now that’s not clear, and if Spurrier knows anything, he’s not tipping his hand.  But in true Ballcoach fashion, he couldn’t resist taking a shot at another school when questioned about the Saunders probe:

“All I know is they had talked to him, and talked to some players at North Carolina. That’s all I know,” Spurrier said. “Whatever comes (of it), we’ll just have to wait and see. But I can assure that all of our players, our team, has been well-versed or taught about agents or people giving them gifts or money or whatever. … So if we have a player that accepts money, gifts from agents or whoever, they’ll be ineligible to play.

“We’re not going to look the other way like possibly Southern California did. We’re going to abide by the rules.”

Spurrier said he had no knowledge Saunders had broken any rules.

“I’m not accusing Weslye of anything. He may be innocent. He may just know those (North Carolina) guys,” Spurrier said. “But we’ll just have to wait and see how it all comes out.” (The State)

Of course, whenever something like this happens to a school, fans of its fiercest rival take to the streets and dance with joy.  But if I’m not Clemson, I wouldn’t be so quick to revel in South Carolina’s current misfortune.

In a previous post over the weekend I referenced that Austin’s troubles may be tied to his dealings with former Tar Heel teammate Kentwan Balmer, who currently plays defensive end for the 49ers.

It appears that the NCAA is focusing on whether or not Austin and teammate Greg Little (and possibly other North Carolina players) had improper contact with agents.  Since Gary Wichard is Balmer’s agent, suffice it to say that he might be the agent at the center of the probe.

Here’s a very big hypothetical, so follow along with me.  Let’s say Wichard is in the habit of getting his current stable of NFL clients to help him procure new clients.  The easiest way to do that would have them reach out to the prospective clients they know best: their old college teammates.

Maybe Wichard nudges guys like Balmer to go back to the alma mater and show NFL ready players like Austin a good time.  Then fancy trips to Miami are paid for, introductions are made, and so on and so forth.  Call it a form of networking that the NCAA doesn’t like one bit.

Another Wichard client happens to be Clemson product C.J. Spiller, who was drafted this past April by the Bills.   If I’m a Clemson fan, I gotta hope that Spiller hasn’t done anything along these lines with players on the current team.  It’s a huge a stretch, but who knows, maybe this is Wichard’s M.O.  Hey, I’m just speculating, but let’s be brutally honest, is it that much of a stretch to say an agent would stretch the rules to get what he wants?

With the NCAA on the rampage right now, stones are getting overturned everywhere.  Go ahead and laugh at your rivals if they happen to be one of the schools that’s already caught it on the chin.  But this is the biggest net I’ve ever seen the NCAA throw, so you’d better hope your team isn’t in queue to get its own probe.