Zach Mettenberger ain’t welcome in Valdosta no more
May 4, 2010 by
John Stansberry
It’s been quite a 2010 for former Georgia football player Zach Mettenberger. Last month he threw for two touchdowns in the Georgia spring game. Then roughly a week later Mark Richt kicked him off the team. And things haven’t gotten any better for the guy:
In an e-mail to ESPN.com, Lowndes County (Ga.) District Attorney J. David Miller said Mettenberger was sentenced to two concurrent 12-month periods of probation under the state’s first-offender act. Miller said Mettenberger also was ordered to pay $2,000 in fines and perform 40 hours of community service, was banished from the city of Valdosta and is to have no contact with the victim. (espn.com)
Am I reading that correctly, he’s BANISHED from the city of Valdosta? I haven’t heard of somebody being banished from a city since “Number One” Paul Jones lost a Loser Leave Town Match to Jimmy Valiant back in the 80’s.
How does this work, does every cop in the city carry his picture around? And if they happen to find him do they rough him up and throw him out the way Little Bill threw William Munny out of Big Whiskey in “Unforgiven?”
Paul Jones and Zach Mettenberger: two losers who had to leave town
Georgia’s a strange place, because in one end of the state, a guy can get banished from an entire city for groping a woman. But in another part of the state, a certain pro quarterback can lock himself in a bathroom and have his way with a woman and never be charged with anything.
I’m not trying to belittle what Mettenberger did, because a woman was indeed violated. But you get what I’m saying. Of course, the big difference is that Mettenberger didn’t have enough cash to hire Ed Garland.
I dated a chick from Valdosta once who turned out to be as crazy as the day is long. So Zach, I think you should consider being banned from that place as being a blessing in disguise.
bigv123 on Wed, 5th May 2010 12:41 am
What’s the world coming to when you can’t even openly grope a college girl’s breasts and ass?? Does anybody REALLY want to live in that world? I think not!
BTW, you used the word “banished”…I do not think that word means what you think it means. No one, and I mean NO ONE gets banished from Valdosta, Ga. I’m certain you meant to say “rewarded”, right? We ARE talking about Valdosta after all.
V